Dear Church Planter

Church planter, I want to talk to you today about numbers. Every church planter faces the temptation to measure the success of their church by numbers. The number of butts in seats, and the number of dollars given in offering. Those two numbers - butts and bucks, become the dominant numbers above all else. And let's be honest, they are pretty important stats. Without people, you don't have a church. And without finances, you can't continue to have a church. At some level these are important numbers. But while these numbers tell a story, they don't tell the WHOLE story.

Two weeks ago we had some of our highest numbers ever. It was close to our highest attendance, and it was by far our highest offering ever. And on Monday, I was feeling pretty good. We had turned a corner, we were on our way forward, ready to hire staff, ready to take our city for Jesus. And then there was this week. Below average attendance, and our lowest Sunday offering ever. And you know what? Monday I felt like sitting in a dark room and listening to Depeche Mode all day.

But then I was reminded of a different set of numbers:

• 1 - the mom who attended with her family on Mother's day and though in her 60s said it was the first time in her life she was moved to tears as God spoke to her through worship.
• 2 - the couple beginning to see God put their marriage back together.
• 3 - the number of kids who were dedicated on Mother's day as parents and families committed themselves to following Jesus together as a family.
• 4 - the family of four who have started coming recently and are finding new life.
• 5 - the family that just moved 2,500 miles to be part of the Story Church team.

So church planter, numbers are important. Attendance and offering are important. But they aren't the most important. A crowd doesn't mean lives are being changed. A great offering doesn't mean that marriages are being healed. Be faithful with what God gives you now, celebrate the numbers that matter most - and in the end, I believe those other numbers will be just fine.

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Adventures in missing the catch

Yesterday, Bills wide receiver Stevie Johnson dropped a pass - a game winning, wide open, overtime pass that would have won the game. That's a bad day no matter what. But then, he tweeted this:

I PRAISE YOU 24/7!!!!!! AND THIS HOW YOU DO ME!!!!! YOU EXPECT ME TO LEARN FROM THIS??? HOW???!!! ILL NEVER FORGET THIS!! EVER!!! THX THO...

The bad day just got worse. Here are just a few thoughts on life and leadership I have after hearing the story (and reading Romans 11 this morning).

1. Watch out for entitlement creep.

It's real easy to confuse God's blessing with entitlement. God doesn't owe us anything. Everything we have has been given to us by him and it's already more than we deserve. Disappointment and failure isn't punishment - it's the ingredients to a great story.

2. Worship is not a commodity to give or withhold. We don't bestow it upon God as though He needs it.

God isn't looking for favors from us. Worship isn't a business transaction where I do my part, now you do yours. God is still God and worthy of worship, but he doesn't owe me because I worship Him.

3. Worship that doesn't change us is worthless.

If we're "praising 24/7" but in the end it's still about us, we may have missed the point. If you and I aren't becoming more humble, more generous, more life-giving to those around us as a result of our worship, then maybe it isn't really worship after all.

4. Perspective comes with time. Allow yourself to go through the process.

I've been in athletic competition where I cost my team the game. My mistake, or my inability to make the play ended our chances. And you know what? There were plenty of great days after that. Whether it's in business, in relationships, or whatever - allow the time necessary to give you the right perspective on the situation. At the end of the day, it's still a football game. I think back to last year's near perfect game by Armando Galarraga - which after replays clearly was a perfect game blown by a bad call. Galarraga handled that disappointment with the utmost class because he stayed calm and held it all in perspective.

5. In the extremes, don't grab a microphone.

A really bad day got a whole lot worse because the disappointment Johnson felt was amplified when he broadcast it to the world. On the other extreme, sometimes in the moment of celebration we over-promise something we can't actually deliver. I think of the Office episode where Michael Scott ends up at a shareholders meeting with the microphone. The crowd starts cheering him and he loses control promising to save the company - something far outside his skill and ability.

I recently had a bad experience with a company's customer service. I too spewed forth on Twitter. I'm thankful that a couple of friends gut-checked me on that one. I blew it. Thankfully I didn't have several thousand followers and a host of media outlets that picked it up. Which brings us to points 6 and 7.

6. Leadership is costly.

When you are in a position of influence, or when your voice carries a lot of weight and/or authority, you pay a great cost. You can live or die on your words. Joe Smith down at the community flag-football game could miss the catch, spew forth on Twitter, and never hear so much as a squeak about it. Not so when you play in the NFL.

Leaders must limit themselves and apply a filter that other people may not have to do. Is that fair? I don't know. But it's reality. As a leader you represent something much bigger than yourself - and that may be your family, your company, your school, or even your church.

7. When you blow it, own it.

No one likes to make mistakes. But when we do, we've got to learn to own our mistakes - especially when they are in plain view of others. Many people fail to do this because they hate to admit defeat - they believe it is weakness. But the truth is that someone that makes a mistake and then owns it is seen as strong, not weak (see the Galarraga story above and the reaction of umpire Jim Joyce).

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Catalyst 2010 Recap

Catalyst is a leadership conference put on every year in the Atlanta area. 13,000 people descend on an arena to hear from some of the best leaders in business and the church. This year's theme was "Tension is good." Each talk had to do with the tension leaders face in many different aspects of leading. It was a really great theme. My goal for this blog post is to give you the twitterized version of each speaker - 140 characters or less. In the following days I'll probably follow this post up with some more depth on one or two of the things God showed me during these few days. So here goes:

Andy Stanley (@andystanley) - Pastor of Northpoint in Atlanta

You have no idea what God wants to accomplish through your life. Don't trade that legacy in for something as temporary as a bowl of stew.

Daniel Pink (@danielpink) - Author "Drive"

What motivates people? We need to get beyond carrots and sticks and give people autonomy, mastery, and purpose.

Christine Caine (@christinecaine) - A21 campaign dealing with human trafficking

Compassion is never compassion until you cross the street and get involved.

Seth Godin - author, blogger, bald guy with cool glasses

Those who change the world aren't the compliant. They are the risk takers, the ones that connect people using their art to give away ideas.

Beth Moore (@bethmoorelpm) - Author, speaker

The tension of insecurity as a leader. Can we be dead enough to ourselves to welcome wherever God is moving and whoever he is leading through?

Francis Chan - pastor, author, speaker

Doing "weird" stuff like selling your house and moving to Asia is completely normal biblically. Caring for the poor and choosing to live with less is the way of Jesus.

Perry Noble (@perrynoble) - Pastor of Newspring church in Anderson, South Carolina

It's easy to follow God when you're by a brook and ravens are bringing you food. When the brook dries up, God isn't punishing you - he's preparing you.

Gabe Lyons (@nextchristians) - author, researcher

The next Christians aren't leaving the church because they don't want to be Christians. They are leaving because they are longing to be part of a restorative movement.

Craig Groeschel (@craig_groeschel) - pastor Lifechurch.tv

Generational tension is necessary for the church to move forward. Older generation needs to invest in the younger. Younger generation needs to honor the older and learn to be under authority well.

T.D. Jakes (@bishopjakes) - pastor of Potter's House church

We must get off the corner (a place of comfort) and into places outside of our comfort zone. We need diversity. God doesn't allow sameness to procreate.

Andy Stanley (@andystanley) - Pastor, author

Every organization has problems that shouldn't be solved and tensions that shouldn't be resolved. The role of the leader is to leverage the tension for the benefit of the organization.

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I fired my wife

It just wasn't working out. I know she was doing the best she could, but the fact is that there was just too much on her plate. One of the hardest lessons I've been learning in the church planting process is how to balance my ministry and my family. And part of that balancing act is making sure my wife isn't trying to do more than she should do either. Yesterday it became pretty clear that her desire to help me and take some things off of my plate was resulting in nothing but stress and feelings of being overwhelmed. So I fired her. I fired her from kids ministry. I fired her from feeling the need to pick things up that don't need to be picked up, and from trying to do everything all at the same time. Maybe being fired is a bit harsh, but she thanked me in the end.

As a leader one of the most important things we do is to make sure the people around us are working/serving in life giving ways. And that happens when people are functioning from areas of strength. People don't get burned out by working too much, they get burned out by working too much doing the wrong things. As a young church of six months, we are just now starting to really understand that. In the beginning it's basically "If you have a pulse, then we need you serving here." But now, as we are growing and getting more volunteers, we can start getting people into areas that are life giving for them. It's not easy, but it's so important for the health of everyone involved, and for the health of our church.

So Kimi was one of the first victims. She was fired from a job that was life sucking rather than life giving for her. And she was reassigned to the things that give her life - being a wife, being a mom, and when she has time - leading and encouraging women to embrace the story they were meant to live.

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The blog that wasn't...

Yesterday I posted a blog, that I then immediately deleted. Here's why - it wasn't anything controversial really, I wasn't calling anyone out, and I wasn't going on a theological rant or anything like that. Actually, it was quite the opposite - it was a short video from the Office, previewing this week's episode. This week Pam and Jim are having their baby, and there was a funny scene where Jim is freaking out. I resonated with his emotions - as my wife is probably going to have a baby in the next two weeks. Of course, in the middle of this clip was some pretty typical Office humor, which by the way I laughed at.

However, the reason for deleting it was not out of a legalism that this was somehow bad or evil (in fact I posted the link above), but that it suddenly occurred to me that not everyone finds that funny. In fact, to some people it may have even been offensive. And as a leader of an organization, a pastor of a church, I suddenly felt the weight of that.

Now, the specifics of the Office aside, I find myself today wrestling with the bigger issue here. How do wisdom and authenticity interact and relate, particularly for a leader? I long to be inwardly exactly who I am outwardly. But here's the deal - as a pastor and a leader I don't simply represent myself. I know of other leaders who have said things publicly that made things difficult for their organization and/or the people associated with it. My guess is that those leaders would probably have guarded their words a little more if they had it to do over again. And particularly with the internet, once it's out there, it's out there forever.

I'm a pretty big fan of the book of Proverbs in the Bible. All throughout this ancient text are warnings about controlling your tongue, holding back, guarding your words. Here are a few:

He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin. - 13:3

Every prudent man acts out of knowledge, but a fool exposes his folly. - 13:16

He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity. - 21:23

Where do you come down on this? Do you "just be you" and let the chips fall where they may in the name of authenticity, or is there a responsibility that rests upon a leader to show a little prudence? Is it being inauthentic to filter yourself, or is it wisdom?

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Humility

Here's some more from Catalyst. It was great to hear from Malcolm Gladwell, the author of The Tipping Point and Outliers. I enjoyed listening to him for the first time. But for some reason I kept thinking "More cowbell."

What does the financial crisis tell us about leadership?
Miscalibration - thinking you know more than you actually know. Overconfidence.
In times of crisis we think we need daring and bold decision making, but we don’t. What we need is humility.

Andy Stanley's questions:
What are the warning signs of an overconfident leader?
- The potential for it is in all of us. All of us start to think we are better than we are.
- We should be looking for it in everyone who is in authority.
- When they stop listening to the people around them, watch out.
Humility = the ability to listen to others.
Can a leader see this in the mirror?
- In the Iraq war, we went in terribly overconfident. There was a point where we realized we were wrong, and had to start over.
What do you say to the leader who has resisted accountability?
- In business there’s a moment where the entrepreneur can no longer do it on their own.
- Growth requires a change in leadership - it can’t all go through one person anymore.

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Catalyst 09

I had the great privilege of going this year to Catalyst, which was last week in the Atlanta area. It was also the first time my wife has gotten to come with me to a conference in a long time (six years we think!). We left the kids at home and had an amazing couple of days listening to some great wisdom. I took notes during most sessions, so over the next few days I'll post my notes on some of the speakers that were there.

My notes are kind of sporadic, so if you have trouble following them and want some clarification, let me know.

First up, Andy Stanley:

Leaders always leave a mark, the question is what kind of mark will you leave?
You won’t really understand the mark you’ve left until way after you’ve made it.
You don’t know a defining moment is happening until long after it happens

Joshua
- He and the people have crossed the Jordan and are beginning to lose their dependence on God.
- At the end of his life he says “as for me and my house we will serve the Lord” - Joshua 23:8-15
- Joshua 5:13 - Are you for us or are you against us? The angel says “no.”
- “I’m not here to be a part of your story. I’m here to find out if you are willing to play a role in my story.”
- This is a question that very few leaders are willing to wrestle with.
- “What message does my Lord have for his servant?”
- Joshua made a decision in that moment to be part of God’s story, not his own.
- V.15 - “Take off your sandals. This is holy ground.”
- Before you make your mark and become a household name, I just wanted to make sure you were going to be a leader not just with authority but under authority.
- This is why late in his life he is able to say “as for me and my house we will serve the Lord.”
- God takes full responsibility for the life wholly devoted to him - Charles Stanley.
- Why do we do what we do and who do we do it for?
- Once we settle that in our lives, then we can live with a freedom that is unexplainable.
- God will take full responsibility.
- Our mark isn’t worth our life. Living to make my mark is too small a thing to give my life to.

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Team Leadership

I read an interesting blog today. You can find it here.
It follows up and even references another article that I read that can be found in the newest issue of Leadership magazine. Apparently there is a trend among younger evangelicals toward churches with a team leadership structure, rather than a hierarchical or senior pastor model. Of course, this intrigues me as I'm getting ready to set out and launch a new church. I really resonate with the idea. I don't want to be the guy in the spotlight, and I certainly don't want a church that is "Jeremy's church." I guess what I wonder though is how you do this in a practical sense. How does it work? How are decisions made? Who sets the vision for the church? Who holds people accountable to their particular ministries? Who does the fundraising for the new church? Who recruits people? It seems like at some point there's got to be a point person. And maybe that is only necessary for the first year or so, up until the church launches. Maybe at that point leadership can be shared. But it's an interesting idea nonetheless. It seems more biblical to me. Rather than one guy trying to be and do everything, there's a team of people who function and minister out of their areas of giftedness. I say it seems biblical, but then again in the New Testament it seems pretty clear that there is a hierarchical structure in place. Form Peter to Paul to Timothy, there are clear cut leaders in the local churches. Paul writes to whole churches at times and urges them to function as the body of Christ, but other times he writes specifically to the leader (Timothy, for example) and encourages him to lead.

It will be interesting to see how this all works itself out in the next 20-30 years. I do think that the current model is lacking. I wonder though if this team leadership model is the answer. My guess is that there is some kind of balance of the two that would be ideal.

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