Life feels kind of crazy right now. I think I'm in one of those stressed times that I get into every so often. I notice that I start to get more quiet, I withdraw from my family, and I don't really want to do much of anything. It usually starts with finances, which is exactly how it is this time. There are certain rhythms to our finances. It seems like we do OK for a few months at a time, and then suddenly the bills all come at the same time, there isn't a paycheck coming for a while, and we have almost no cash in the bank. I don't know why I stress about it so much. Like I said, this seems to happen every few months, and we always make it. God always provides for us in amazing ways. And yet, I still stress over it.
Add to that our newly growing family. Joy had her worst night ever last night. She had us up almost all night long trying to get her to sleep. I was definitely not happy about it as I was really tired. I let that frustration come out, and I think I left my wife in a position where she felt like she had to deal with it. On top of that, Hannah has an infection of some kind that makes her scream in pain every time she goes to the bathroom. So this morning Kimi is taking her to the doctor, trying to tote the baby around, and having to watch her sister. Meanwhile, as she is pulling out of the garage we notice she is almost out of gas - back to the finances....
Ahhh!! I'm just frustrated today. I've also missed our winter retreat this weekend in order to be home, and that has really been weighing on me. I'm glad I have been home to help out with Hannah and with the baby. But at the same time I feel like I missed out on a weekend of hanging out with our students.
Listen to me, I sound selfish and whiny this morning. God help me to change my attitude and suck it up. I know that you are faithful to meet all of our needs and I just need to trust you. I don't think it's any accident that this is the week I'm supposed to talk about the 4th commandment in my series on the 10 commandments. This is the one about the Sabbath. It reminds me of the need for a rhythm of work and rest in my life. I feel like I get plenty of time off, I'm just not sure I use that time to rest. So it will be good for me to study this command and refresh my spirit as we discuss sabbath this week. In the meantime, I need to buy my wife some flowers. She's amazing and I need to remind her of that today.
1 comments:
I read it.
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